How Gratitude Made me Into A Successful Single Mother

If you’re interested in the idea of personal development and finding ways to improve your life and your outlook on life, you’ll probably have come across the idea of gratitude

how gratitude made me into a successful single mother
how gratitude made me into a successful single mother

How Gratitude Made Me Into A Success-ful Single Mother

If you’re interested in the idea of personal development and finding ways to improve your life and your outlook on life, you’ll probably have come across the idea of gratitude and appreciation and the ways that it can help your life and, in essence, make you feel better.

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Gratitude

If you really pay attention to the personal development circles where this type of thing is discussed, you may have also heard that there is quite a debate about which one is better – gratitude or appreciation. Which one is better at helping you reduce negativity and help increase positivity? While gratitude has long been touted as being the key to getting yourself into a good feeling place and making lists of things that you are grateful for, appreciation is steadily overtaking the concept of gratitude due to its purer thought offering.
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It’s believed that the feeling of appreciation is one that is more beneficial to you because there’s no stigma attached to it. If you used the idea of expressing feelings of love towards your friends, family, your workplace – anything – then there can be discord in the thought that you are offering. That’s because the concept of “love” means different things to different people – some use the idea of romance to mean love and some believe that real love has more of a grassroots spiritual connotation.

Appreciation, on the other hand is much purer. You can’t deny that the concept of appreciation is more likely to mean a similar thing to most people. Unlike something such as love, which is increasingly overused in life, movies, marketing and much more, appreciation is a much cleaner thought offering that has no negative stigma attached to it.

Some believe that while gratitude can be a great way of helping to relieve negative feelings, the actual concept of gratitude is one that is not as pure as appreciation. Some people can take the idea of gratitude as feeling indebted to something or someone – or, feeling empowered by someone else.

For example, for some people, the idea of gratitude comes from the sense of feeling as though you couldn’t have achieved your current state and the current success without someone else.

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For some people, depending on how you view the concept of the word, it can be a self-depreciating concept. In those religions and philosophies where the idea of gratitude has played a large role in the teachings, gratitude comes from the idea of being humble, by not asking for more than you deserve and to be at the mercy of a greater power. In more modern ideas of self development – that is not so much based on any religion – it is more preferable to not use the term “gratitude” as it can stir up all of these ideas of being indebted to others or some higher power. For those that have issues with self-confidence and that need help finding their own power and determination, it can be somewhat of a problem to feel as though that you are the mercy of life and not in control of it.

That’s why the term appreciation has been used in more recent teachings. Appreciation does not hold the negative connotations that gratitude may hold for some people. Anyone in any situation can benefit from taking the time to appreciate the elements of your life that are working well for you. Appreciation can be such a pure thought offering due to its lack of negativity that it can help you any time when you want to try and leave negativity behind.

As there are no discrepancies in the idea of appreciation, it means that it really can help you to soften any negative mindset that you find yourself in. Just a few minutes of finding things that you appreciate about your current situation, or even finding physical items near to where you are can do a great job in helping to lift you out of any situation.

In essence, it doesn’t really matter what words you use when trying to get into a good-feeling mindset. If you don’t feel that there is any difference between gratitude and appreciation (they can be the same thing for most people) then it’s not important. What is important is that you find that feeling of appreciation/gratitude.

No matter what you call it and what words you use, it’s important that you are able to not simply go around saying that you appreciate something when you don’t. The words don’t matter. What matters is that you actually feel that appreciation. You will definitely be able to tell whether you’re just using words or whether you actually have the feeling of appreciation. Many people wonder why they are not necessarily feeling better when they begin to appreciate and that maybe because they are not actually getting into a state of appreciation – they’re making lists without feeling it.

Appreciation Is Gratitude!

You do not have to be in a negative place in order to appreciate. You can appreciate even when you feel as though you’re in a great mood. Appreciation can help to keep those good moods going as much as they can help you to move out of a bad one.

So why is appreciation so important? We’ve already touched upon the fact that appreciation has a pure thought offering – much purer than the much-abused notion of love – that it can help to focus on a thought process that has no negativity associated with it. Appreciation is always positive and, if you can focus on only positive aspects, it can be the only thing that you need to in order to get out of that negative place.

Appreciation is a great way of finding the best. It’s finding the best in the moment, in your situation, in your family and friends, your job – and even the room that you’re in. Appreciation also helps as you go about your day-to-day life because it means that you’re set in a mindset to ensure that you’re always looking for the best. It’s much more difficult to fall into a positive state when you’re looking at the best in every moment.

You can appreciate what you’re going to do that day as soon as you awaken in the morning. You can appreciate the food that you eat, the moments that you spend with others, your home, nature, the sun on your face: you can appreciate yourself into sleep. It’s also great to use appreciation when you feel a negative feeling approaching. If you begin to come across a situation that you don’t want, make sure that you begin appreciating the best of the situation that you are in.

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Avoid Negativity, Get To Gratitude....

Throughout the living of life, it’s obvious that you’re going to come up against negative feelings towards certain aspects of your experience. There’s no way that you’re going to avoid all of these situations and yet, the idea of avoiding negativity is not actually about avoiding those situations that you don’t want to be in – that’s almost impossible; the idea of avoiding negativity is actually about avoiding that negative emotion that is associated with that situation.

In life, there are obviously going to be some things that you would rather not do and situations that you would rather not be in. When faced with this situation, people tend to look for a solution to that problem. That’s obvious. However, it’s important to realize that there’s always another way that you can respond to the situation and that response doesn’t have to be based around looking for a way out. The best thing that you can first do is to look to get rid of the negativity that you are feeling. That’s because, if you begin to look for a solution and then find that there is no easy way out of that situation, you’re stuck with a negative feeling that can spiral out of control. No, the best thing to do is always focus on getting rid of that negative emotion first. That’s because, whether or not you can change the outcome of a situation, you can always control your emotional response to it.

Let’s use some examples….

Let’s say that you are worried about not being able to find a job. This situation can easily cause you to become stressed and frustrated. In a situation like this you can remain frustrated while heading out and looking for a job or you can get yourself into a positive mindset and then go out there and get a job. If you headed out and looked for a job with a negative attitude and those feelings of frustration, they could be worsened by any rejection that you receive or the inability to find a suitable job. However, if you take the time to pre-pave your positive attitude before you take any action, whatever the outcome of the situation, you will be in a much better place to maintain a positive attitude.

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Positive thinking is all about finding the best in every situation and, if you begin to sort out problems from a negative standpoint, it’s like getting the cart before the horse. It’s not that it’s wrong to take action towards doing something, but you do always have a choice to do that in a positive or negative way. If you’re going to do something, do it once you’ve given yourself the support that a positive attitude gives you.

So as we’re talking about removing your negative attitude and not trying to struggle out of a situation, we can liken it trying to work your way out of quicksand. When you struggle and push against what you don’t want (negative outlook) you actually make it worse. Often, it’s best to take a step back, find that positive place where you’re not fighting your way out of a situation and, once you’ve found that positive mindset, allow yourself to follow inspiration out of that unwanted situation. Your thoughts will be much clearer when you’re looking with a more positive perspective.

How Has Gratitude Worked For You?

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About Me

I am Marie Tavernier, the creator and author of this blog, I’ve been writing extensively on life coaching, personal development, the law of attraction and mind and body health for the past ten years. I am also the author of my first published short novel From Little Acorns Grow a Forest, where you can learn more about my journey into coaching and hopefully learn a little about you too. This blog aims to provide women, especially mum’s (i’m a mum of two) like me with the tools to increase their health and well being, whilst staying grounded and motivated to start and maintain their own online businesses. I am passionate about all of the above, because I believe it takes more than an idea to make a success of anything.

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